You're Too Good For The Likes of Me

by R
(NZ)

I try each day to be better than yesterday so I can show you the way. I want to be the best for you so you can be the best you too. Sometimes I think I've grown and yes, perhaps I have, but I struggle to keep my temper in check when I become frustrated.

I know all the theory, I know what to do. But putting it into practice, I don't know why it goes wrong.

My eyes glaze and I get angry why can't I just be good enough? Why can't you just understand?

I hate that my temper flares and I hate that I can't separate my emotions from training you.

I hate that I yelled at you. I hate that I used force on you with ill intent. I hate that I confused you, scared you and hurt you.

I hate myself for wronging you.

I know you forgive me because you can't be plagued with emotion. You can't hold a grudge.

I am too lucky to know that next time I see you, you will nicker and come running up to me.

I will be grateful and thankful that you still hold love for me.

I promise to try harder, to be better for you. I will try my best to tame my emotions.

Next time we see each other, we will do our best. We will be a team again.

A girl and her horse...learning together.

A girl fighting her demons. A girl learning to be kind.