I Died Inside That Night

by Don
(Mandaluyong City, Philippines)

To my good old friend Apple L. I don't even know if you are going to read about this because darn-it it's the "internet"! But, I'm apologizing for things I said. I was having a very very horrible day & worse comes worst, I took it out on you. In the first place, NEVER did I looked upon you in my whole life that you are a person whom is "pas-importante". Never did I looked upon you that you are an "attention wh*re" or someone who clings up to some other people and "bitches" about her problems without regards.

In fact, YOU became one of my inspirations in this life of mine. You are one of the reasons why I was studying so hard because I salute and acknowledge your academic performance and way of thinking ever since we were young.

YOU are one of the reasons why I was striving hard to develop myself better and better everyday both physical, mental and emotional.

I didn't "loved" you for the sake of a more intimate relationship or "bf-gf thing" rather I did that because I know, you are one of the keys on how do I make my life reasonable and worth living. I looked up on you so much. That's why that night you called up on me on that matter and you were tremendously in a violent tantrum, it made me felt like I should literally die right now. I disregarded the fact that you are emotionally upset which lead you to not even listen to a word I say.

All I cared about that night is the moment when you told me that our friendship was over, in which I was truly devastated. The feeling of death is merely in me during that night, I didn't even sleep for 2 days just because of me thinking about that matter...

Again, I understand and hear you when you say my actions or words hurt you and I'm sorry for hurting you.

I LOVED YOU SO MUCH AS A FRIEND and only want to find a way to move past this. I understand you might not be ready to talk, so know how important this is to me to resolve and please let me know when you feel better and can guide me to a batter place with you.